Can I believe Elizabeth is graduating in a few months?
Can I believe that another leg of her journey in life is ending?
Can I believe that all the hard work she has done in her life to get to this point will matter now more than ever?
The answer to all the above is pretty much a big NO.
I mean logically I know that graduation is coming and that her high school years are ending and that all the life skills she has been working on will really be called on in her future, but it is really hard to let it in
Maybe that is because school has always been in our world, or that it seems impossible to think that she will be entering the “real world”, or that because of her Dyspraxia, she seems younger than her actual years.
Any and all of the above could be the reason for this weird denial state I am in.
I know Elizabeth is ready to move on, she has said as much and has really done all that she can in high school. She has been given many wonderful experiences there but by virtue of schools being schools, there is a limit to what can be done.
Now to move on, but how to move on?
We have done a great deal of talking about graduation.
We have done a great deal of talking about what comes after graduation.
And we have done a great deal of talking about her feelings on all the above.
And after we stopped talking, I could see her stress kicking in and her sensory issues start back up.
Not to a great degree but, when you know your child as well as we all know our own, you can tell when they are starting to be in overload.
So the place we are in right now is one of change. Change of what she knows and loves to the unknown.
Excitement and readiness for the new, but anxiety and overload at taking the first step towards it.
My feelings and emotions are running in many directions, and I anticipate that this will continue at least until the graduation ceremony is in the rear view mirror. . I can see that this adjustment will be one of the biggest ones we have made. And I can see lots more talking and emotions from her in the next few months. But something I realized as I talked to Elizabeth is that I will have to settle my thoughts to help her
Well, at least settle them for the moment, as I help her with her feeling, fears and excitement. So I have some work to do!
Life for our children is work, and at times it is very sad to see that the little things become huge to them. And the life changes that are huge for everyone, become so big we have to break them down into manageable pieces or we risk overloading our children.
Sometimes it is just not possible to have the luxury of being able to dissect something and then take your time going over it. Sometimes life says “here it is, deal with it now!”
And those are the times, I pray that all the coping, tools and strategies we have taught her will come into play and be used by her. She will always need supports in place for success. And we will always need to add/subtract or modify them. But, look at how far she has come in life.
The next step has to be one that fits her needs and likes.
We want nothing else than for life to continue to be a growing and learning and safe thing for Elizabeth.
So many feelings so many thoughts.
We may not believe that graduation time has come, but know our precious Elizabeth, that we will work together to guide you as you step out into the next path on your journey.
That we love you so much.
That we believe in you.